Author: twoshadesoff

We get black widow spiders here in Georgia. But in Vegas, where I lived for a long time, we get allloootttt more. At my apartment they’d make webs on my porch. Sometimes I’d fuck with them. They’re very timid and I’d pluck their web and watch them run away. It made me laugh. I’d also…

I was 21. I was driving a 78 Chevy Nova. Left everything I owned behind except what I could fit into the car. Which included tools, extra water, and a few spare parts. I had just replaced the fuel pump, speakers, and installed a CD player a week before I left. I knew that car…

One of my best friends, Chris Mize… we actually started out as enemies on the bus to elementary school. He lived close to me, which was around 5 miles… dirt road country and all. We used to play a “bomber” game. We’d take blackcats which is a firecracker you light then it explodes. We’d wait…

One of the most awesome women I’ve even known. She got into an abusive relationship. She broke it off, but gave him a 2nd chance. So far it’s going good, but I let her know. I’m from GA, grew up hunting and fishing. Told her if he lays a hand on her again he’d never…

This was many many years ago. I met her online… took her to dinner. She didn’t look like her pic… don’t like to,body shame but she wasn’t as attractive. So I took her out to dinner. I wanted to give her a chance. I kept trying to make conversation but I couldn’t get a word…

It’s called Idiopathic Hypersomnia. Very similar to narcolepsy. I’d fall asleep at the wheel in Vegas. But Vegas doesn’t/didn’t use regular white lines/dashes. They use reflective … for lack of a better term… bubbles? ‘Anyways when I fell asleep at the wheel those bumpers would wake me up so I could straighten my car up.…

One morning I was getting ready for school. I didn’t have any clean underwear. So I went without any. It felt so “free” and I liked the breeze under there. So I never wore underwear again. That’s when I realized why girls like skirts/dresses. That breeze was awesome. That’s all.

Once when I was homeless I had a sign that said “free complements”. A lady drove up and stopped. I’m pretty sure she was expecting something superficial like “you’re pretty” or some crap like that. But that ain’t my style. I only give sincere complements. I looked at her for a minute or so, and…

Yall are our closest friends… the idea of us trying to “annex you and make you our fifty first state” sickens me. Apple should annex all Trumps companies. Microsoft should annex all Musks’ companies. The whole world should enforce a trade embargo on the US until Trurm either leaves office or stops acting like a…

Loved that bar. It was a small local bar and had good country on the jukebox. For yall kids… that’s a machine you put a quarter in and select a song and it plays it for ya. Before your time. Anyways, I was in a mischievous mood. One guy there was talking non stop about…