Author: twoshadesoff

Probably ain’t a good idea to post this, but I’m pretty sure I still have a warrant for my arrest in Texas. “Come at me bro!”

I must have been 16 or 17 years old. One day, can’t remember the exact words you said but it made me feel like I’d never see you again. Made me cry my ass off. I was crying so hard I didn’t think it was safe to drive. So I went to the Waffle House…

Picked up a girl at the bar once. We got to my place but we were too tired for “sexy time”. So we went to sleep. I woke up in the morning, saw her, and I thought “what the FUCK was I thinking?” The end.

Once I stopped to think but forgot to start again.

She was from South Africa. I was around 17 years old. I had already been with many people by then. She was the 1st to ever make me cry, and it’s really hard to make me cry. I was raised “boys don’t cry”.

at a club I went to every week… I always saw her and I was always in awe of her. After months I mustered up the courage to talk to her. We went back to my place. I was going to Daytona the next day to meet my dad. I asked her if she’d be…

One of my biggest loves. It was early in the relationship, but she mentioned in passing she needed a microwave stand. It took me about a week, but I built her one. In my opinion it was ugly as shit but she needed one, and it did its job so in my mind I did…

I was in navy jrotc. I was one of the few selected to train at a marine base. It was hard and I passed but that didn’t matter to me. Half way through we were at attention in ranks, and a kid dropped dead. They said it was an aneurysm. But it still messed with…

once I was babysitting her. It was lunch time. Can’t remember everything she wanted on her sandwich. But I remember she wanted a whooooole bunch of mayonnaise. I told her she wouldn’t like it but she insisted. I’m a “told you so” kind of dad. So I let her put what seemed like half a…

Once I had sex on the Hoover Dam. Thank you Canada.